Sunday, December 19, 2010

Today I want to write. I don't know about what, but I realize, even though this might be a manifestation of my scattered and disconnected thoughts, I need to vent out. I need to talk. To a stranger, to a world I don't know. And may be, this is my best possible escape.

I stare out of the window at the white world. It's quite a sunny day, but still freezing. It's too lonely out here, I don't see anyone walk by. Couple of cars every now and then. And that is all.

Like everyone, I wish I had someone. But it has always been like this. Reminds me of a song "Lonliness is always looking for a friend, It found me once and it has been there since then. Lonliness never waits by the door, it sweeps in and it can never be ignored..Why, why was I chosen? Why am I left behind?" I think most people in this world are in fact very lonely. Despite of the parties, despite of the giggles and laugh, they all come to their bedroom...and bury their head and cry. They stand in the shower and cry. There are some who show it, and some who has too much of a pride to admit. But the fact is, in this world, despite of so much social networking which gives you a fake feeling of being connected(...oh someone commented on my statys msg, cause they care, whereas the truth is...it's cause they had nothing else to do), despite of talking on phone with your best friend for two hours, despite of Friday night outs and parties, despite of the fact that probably never in history of mankind people have been so outgoing, gregarious...yet more disconnected than ever. We have forgotten how to feel. Feel beyond ourselves.